We thought we'd come up with this new fad, which will surely spice up your sexlife, if not revolutionize sex itself.
Do not attempt any of these bold moves unless you are at least grade 2B advanced in the arts of sex. Don't know what that means? Then PLEASE DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME! Don't be a hero. Think I'm kidding? My friend broke his arm. Also, do not mention knowledge of any of these moves to your loved one. In fact if you are in love (our deepest regrets) , don't read it at all.
Alright our hands are clean.
SKANK MATERIAL ONLY
Cum along, we'll begin...
1 - The Corkscrew
2 - The Funnel
3 - The Pile Driver
4 - The Caterpillar
5 - The Cocoon (And no, I don't mean that old ass movie with the retirement home folks)
6 - The Lawnmower
7 - The Restless Pom Pom (So many memories)
8 - The Whiteout (AKA get yourself a towel)
9 - The Slap Me Silly Sally
10 - The Forklift
11 - The Wet Slinky
12 - The Backdoor (pretty obvious... or not)
13 - The Chipped Tooth
14 - The Drunken Hitchhiker (DO NOT TAKE LITERALLY)
15 - The Reversed Pogo Stick
16 - The V neck (AKA the Slingshot)
17 - The Bricklayer (DO NOT TAKE LITERALLY EITHER)
18 - The Hello Kitty (DO NOT BE MISTAKEN, REMEMBER, JUST FOR SKANKS)
19 - The Spitting Image (That's right, it's exactly what you're thinking)
20 - The Slip n' Slide
21 - The Cat in The Hat
22 - The O.K. Corral (Only legal in Oklahoma, but we're rule breakers... It's OOOOH K!!)
23 - The Knucklehead
24 - The Fountain of Youth (MILFS ONLY. COUGARS ACCEPTED...)
25 - The Pooper Scooper (Not to be confused with "two girls and a cup". We're freaks, but that's nasty...)
26 - The B & E (One of my Favs!)
27 - The Teardrop (Objective: Make her cry.)
28 - The Noose
29 - The Purple Nurple
30- The Rump Roast
31- The 9/11 (AKA The Twin Towers.....God bless)
32- The Armaggeddon
33- The Hole in One
34- The W.M.D. (Weapon of Mass Destruction)
Further instructions will follow, for now, just use your imagination. And nothing else!
1 - The Corkscrew
2 - The Funnel
3 - The Pile Driver
4 - The Caterpillar
5 - The Cocoon (And no, I don't mean that old ass movie with the retirement home folks)
6 - The Lawnmower
7 - The Restless Pom Pom (So many memories)
8 - The Whiteout (AKA get yourself a towel)
9 - The Slap Me Silly Sally
10 - The Forklift
11 - The Wet Slinky
12 - The Backdoor (pretty obvious... or not)
13 - The Chipped Tooth
14 - The Drunken Hitchhiker (DO NOT TAKE LITERALLY)
15 - The Reversed Pogo Stick
16 - The V neck (AKA the Slingshot)
17 - The Bricklayer (DO NOT TAKE LITERALLY EITHER)
18 - The Hello Kitty (DO NOT BE MISTAKEN, REMEMBER, JUST FOR SKANKS)
19 - The Spitting Image (That's right, it's exactly what you're thinking)
20 - The Slip n' Slide
21 - The Cat in The Hat
22 - The O.K. Corral (Only legal in Oklahoma, but we're rule breakers... It's OOOOH K!!)
23 - The Knucklehead
24 - The Fountain of Youth (MILFS ONLY. COUGARS ACCEPTED...)
25 - The Pooper Scooper (Not to be confused with "two girls and a cup". We're freaks, but that's nasty...)
26 - The B & E (One of my Favs!)
27 - The Teardrop (Objective: Make her cry.)
28 - The Noose
29 - The Purple Nurple
30- The Rump Roast
31- The 9/11 (AKA The Twin Towers.....God bless)
32- The Armaggeddon
33- The Hole in One
34- The W.M.D. (Weapon of Mass Destruction)
Further instructions will follow, for now, just use your imagination. And nothing else!
I wanna try the Armageddon, can I??
ResponderEliminarWell you can, because you have the proper training. But the administration declines all responsability in case anything goes wrong. Proceed with extreme caution.
ResponderEliminar